Heart wrenching

This week has been exhausting and heart wrenching.
My Dad's health turned quite suddenly, and we all quickly realized how unprepared we are for what may lie ahead of us.

He felt some nausea on Wednesday, which slowly escalated through the weekend.
He was Very Gassy, and unable to hold down any food.
He experienced indigestion, acid reflux and a bloated belly.
All of this equalled discomfort and pain.

On Monday he went into his physician who was very reassuring.
The Dr. thought that it was a stomach virus.
He was prescribed anti acids and sent home.

He went into his oncologist yesterday, since the symptoms, though better, had not subsided.
He was still not able to  eat very much.
Today he was sent in for an emergency CAT Scan
and blood work.

We are now waiting the results.
our hearts are heavy. We are tremendously worried.
He was so full of energy a week ago.
It is hard to think that the cancer could cause so much stress so suddenly.
But at this point, who even knows what the cancer is capable of.

the hardest part of this whole journey has been the unknown.
We wait, we hope, we pray... and we live each day.
Each day is a true blessing
Each moment is heaven sent.

I cannot fathom my life without my Dad
I cannot fathom a life for my kids without their Grandfather.

He seems so very Vital to our lives.
Life is so fragile, and so fleeting.
It is unpredictable.
we truly cannot rest in the guarantee of a tomorrow
but live each precious day, each second; knowing that life on this Earth is not ours to keep.
it is simply a short opportunity to love and appreciate the gifts that we are given
so that we may ultimately grow closer to HIM.

If there is one thing I honestly, and truly realize,
It is that my dad is and always has been a GIFT
and I owe my love of God to him, because he has been my first experience of
sacrificial love and true forgiveness.

His tender guiding hand can never be forgotten.

Going with the flow is the easy part... unless there is a really strong undertow.

I guess it's just easy to get on with life as best as you can during he initial stages of this battle. We ground ourselves with "normal" activities, not to get away from the reality of the disease... but to live life to the fullest despite the disease

My Dad's recent visit with his 8 siblings and his Mom

The progress of the disease goes by fairly unnoticed. You figure... well, No news is good news and continue on with your daily routine and treatment. I don't know if everyone journey's through this challenge in the same way or not. I just know, that up until now, we have had the "wait and see" mentality.

Chelation therapy is being continued. Along with daily mineral and vitamin treatments. Dad is on his organic raw food diet, and is loosing weight rapidly. sugars and high proteins have been cutback. we have focused on eliminating toxins from his diet and environment.

The initial results of this treatment went well. Dad's Cancer cell count dropped dramatically, from 100+ to 27 in the first month of treatment.

In late August Dad's Cancer cell count was over 300

and in Late September it had sky rocketed to the 1,000's

We were devastated by this news.

We walked in with such high hopes, and we have found that the struggle to maintain the height of those hopes is beyond what we bargained for.

Through all of this,



At Chelation therapy



My dad remains courageous.

He is determined to stay the natural route.
Up until now, he has felt great.
He has had high energy and remain prayerful and positive.
He is a model to us all.

His greatest stress thus far is his finances.
I hate to see himself wearing himself down with worry.
But the truth is, finances are tight.
No insurance covers the cost of the natural treatment.
Savings are slim (with 7 kids...1 still at home, who would have savings?)
And to top it all off, with the amount of time he spends in treatment, he has had to go on disability.

Our current goal is to try to get Dad to the Greer Clinic in Tijuana, Mexico.
The cost is high, but if my dad wants natural treatment, he definitely deserves the best.

I have taken a few odd jobs to try to put some money together, but my responsibilities at home with homeschool, keep my options limited. I am trying to get creative, but have been blessed with a handful of piano and vocal students, and a directing job at the local children's theatre.

Every little bit helps :)

If you feel moved to give.
I encourage you to click on our "give forward" button at the upper right side of this blog. Every Penny.

I will be sure to update more often, as we begin to see signs of the cancer's growth.


May God bless you and your families.
May you hold them all as Dear as I hold mine

Profound Moments and Miracles

The last couple of days have been very difficult. We received some very sad news Monday evening. It would seem that our cup is overflowing with tears from all of our trials.... but we have never been more joyful.

Why?

Because God is so GREAT, that He never fails to make
His presence known to us.
I can say that with such amazing conviction...

This past Monday, we learned that Miguel's baby is a beautiful boy!
We are overjoyed at this news, as the plan is to name him after my father...
"William".

Unfortunately, our little one has his work cut out for him. William Michael was diagnosed with a Congenital heart condition called Hypoplastic Left Heart Disease or HPLS. This is a rare condition which will require immediate surgery to open his left heart ventricle. Needless to say, Miguel and Jessica were devastated at the news.

So,Why are we so joyful?
our Testimony of Faith begins here...

As many of you  know
In February of 2012,
as we were preparing to begin our Lenten journey...
My Dad was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.
It seemed all too fitting that my Dad unite his sufferings with the Passion of Christ. We knew that our Lenten journey would be more heartfelt, more intense than it ever was before. We wondered at the time if we had the strength to endure what God was calling us to. It was a time of such desperation for us, and it was a time of vigilant prayer. My family grew closer to the church around this time. Family members that had spent some time away from the faith turned back towards it. They invested all of their love and offered up all of their fears and anxiety. It seemed that God was truly inviting all of us to share in a portion of the Cross. It only became more profound when we realized that the color purple (the color of lent ), was also the color for the pancreatic cancer. It seemed to be NO coincidence that our dad was called to his journey of suffering at such an appropriate time.

This seemed to us miraculous evidence of God's Providence.

But Gods' love for us seems only to transcend itself,
for as we are faced with another trail,
we are given, yet again ANOTHER sign of His ubiquity!!

As my family spent the evening of William Michael's diagnosis trying to comfort each other, I reached out to my Bread of Life Home school family for prayers and support, only to have a most encouraging response by one of my most precious sisters in Christ. She pointed out, how fitting it was for the baby to be diagnosed during the Month of Jesus' most Sacred Heart; Just another sign of God's constant and miraculous presence in our lives.

We are NOT alone,  and our hearts are brimming with Joy.
May they also be filled with the Love for Jesus' most Sacred Heart.

Feelings, thoughts, and struggles.

A week ago, my sister came up with the idea for everyone to pray for 24 hours through out the week for my Dad's CT scan results. At first, I thought I couldn't do it, and that a hour would be too long for me to pray and sit there contemplating what my dad was going thru instead of praying and hoping for the best.

But as soon as I began, I couldn't stop asking questions and seeking answers for the this hard time in our lives and in my Dad's.

In my hours of prayer I read the bible and sang and worshiped the LOrd. The first two days went by quick and after the third I did even more than I was asked to do. At times I felt lost, and it puzzled me to the point of seeing what seemed like dark shadows when I wasn't praying, reading the bible and worshiping the LOrd. I think that this was an outward sign of my struggle with doubt and worry.

 My Dad is an inspiration not only for me, but for everyone out there that is going through the same thing or even worse. I would like to thank Scarlett my sister for this oppertunity to share this life experience with everyone.

God has blessed us with a awesome family and friends to support us thru this Joyrney of ups and downs.

Daniella

In Search for Better Healing

Tomorrow we are going back to Florida.
I feel more hopeful than ever.
I expect, this time, to have my loving husband better and stronger by the end of this treatment session.
The first time we were there, I witnessed such a big change. What a difference from the chemo and radiation.

I saw my husband withering away. Even if he didn't necessarily show such change at the end of each round of radiation, each surgery, each day of chemo, by the end of it all... I saw him withering day by day.
The sparkle in his eyes was almost gone.
How painful it was to see him that way.
The sparkling eyes that I had fallen in love with.

He lost so much weight.
He almost looked as if it was just skin covering his bones.
His joyful spirit was almost gone.
I shivered with the fear that I was looking at death surrounding him.
BUT After this first round of treatment with Dr. Ghen... Everything seemed to turn around.
He is full of spirit, hope, sparkle and life.
So I know that this second treatment will be even stronger and more beneficial.

In the depths of my heart, I feel that God is holding us by our hands, and
Leading us down the path of healing.

And I praise God for it.




Martha

Brazynski Clinic realization

Friday was a difficult day, but if I may skew things in a positive light....
we are a little closer to an actual decision.

For the past couple of week, my parents have been on cloud nine with the possibilities presented to us by our discovery of the Brazynski clinic. It was in viewing Brazynski's documentary, that we were all flooded with hope and the potential that his clinic might lead us to a cure.

My parents set out straight away to contact the clinic. They were thrilled to have an appointment with Brazynski a mere 5 days after contacting the clinic. They gathered medical files from MD Anderson and their family doctor and drove to the clinic to hand off all the necessary information.

The next step was for my Dad to transfer all of his savings into an accessible account to pay for the consultation and the treatment.... It was during this step that my internal warning light began flashing and I decided to do more thorough research. I guess what concerned me the most, is that my parent's savings is a mere pittance in comparison with many saving accounts. I am sure it must have been the years of private schools, college tuitions, medical bills, transferring overseas and then back again, and the hundreds and hundreds of times my Dad has been there to bail all of us out of our financial jams. I guess he just figured that the money was better off being used by one whom needed it, rather than letting it sit in an online account to collect virtual dust.

My findings on the Brazynski clinic were, at first, startling. I weeded through countless articles about the "quackery" of his studies. I was alarmed, but I knew that I couldn’t depend on the secondhand biased writings of people whose very mission it is to discredit people with new ideas.... so, I kept searching. What I was looking for were some real, TRUE, firsthand accounts of the treatment and how it worked. I found some who were against the treatment... and some who were for it. Apparently, the treatment actually worked for many who were on it. This seemed to be a good thing :).

Now, my focus shifted on to research of the treatment itself, as well as the out of pocket expense. What I found were numerous accounts of people reportedly paying $20-30,000 for a month's worth of treatment. Now, I am not sure if the amount paid was just for the initial month.... or if it was even an amount that varied by person. All I knew was that an amount such as that would wipe my parent’s savings clean in a very short amount of time .One thing I knew for sure, my parent’s insurance would not cover this treatment, and my dad would have to be on the treatment for an extended amount of time. THIS was a huge concern, but definitely not a deciding factor, because in our minds… no amount of money is too much for my Dad’s treatment.

What did end up being our deciding factor? PRACTICABILITY
How useful was this particular treatment going to be for our particular situation?

According to the research I did based on Brazynki’s studies; his specialization is in Brain tumors. He is currently in Phase III of his Antineoplaston treatment, which my dad would not qualify for because A) he is not suffering from a brain tumor and B) he has already received traditional treatment via chemo and radiation. That means that he would only qualify for phase I or phase II. In both of these phases, it seems that my Dad would be treated with predominantly traditional chemo meds. The question became… did we want to pay so much money for a treatment plan that was predominantly based on the same treatment he would get from a place like MD Anderson?

At the end of a long week that began with an overwhelming feeling of hope and the conviction that Dr. Brazynski’s treatment was THE ONE. My parents prayerfully decided to collect their files from the clinic and pour their hearts and money into another alternative source. Dr. Brazynski came out personally to give them back their files. I genuinely believe that his treatment leads to a cure for some, but we are still on a hunt for the treatment that God wills for us.

Our Search is
TO BE CONTINUED………

Facing Treatment Options

In the past month, since the end of my dad's first round of chemo and radition, we have spent a tremendous amount of time in research. We have researched alternative medicine, the integration approach, new science, current cancer researches, traditional medicine... you name it, we have read about it. Still, everyday we find out something new.

Of course, there is SO much information out there, it is hard for us to know what is real and what is trash...
and lets face it, there is ALOT of trash out there.

We have been fortunate enough to have such supportive friends and family. We have friends with experience with THIS disease, and we are constantly learning from them.

One of the first alternative treatments that my Dad tried is Chelation Therapy. I have to say, our experience with this treatment has been amazing. My parents have been traveling from Houston to Florida for this therapy. Now, I do understand that there is a Doctor in Houston that does this therapy... but our family's prior experience with Dr. Glen, in Florida sets us at ease.

In the past 3 weeks, since Dad began the chelation treatment, he has felt; Energized, healthy, strong, AND his appetite is BACK.
The fact that his appetite is back is a HUGE deal. One of the most emotionally exhausting experiences I have had is seeing my Dad drop from a BIG, Jolly 240lbs.... to a fragile looking 170.
Loosing weight that quickly has an astounding effect on muscle mass.
It was a painful thing, to be massaging his head and tracing his Ash-colored face, only to feel the depths of his facial orifice against his excessively pronounced cheekbone. I literally was witnessing my Dad waisting away.

Since the beginning of the Chelation therapy, my Dad is BACK.
Now, he is still only 175lbs But it is a healthy 175. He has regained some muscle tone, and his complexion is more vibrant.
More importanatly, he feels better than ever.

WE have decided to stick with this therapy. It includes a regimin of vitamins and minerals, both taken orally and intavenously.
It also incldes a change in diet and a reduction in exposure to heavy metal products.

Our NEW found habits:

to read every grocery label in the store
To buy organic
to explore new recipes
to Eat 80% raw food
and to JUICE JUICE JUICE.

These are our considerations for the near future:

-Dr. Bryzinski' Clinic in Houston
- The Block center in illinois
-Traditional medicine and surgery at M.D Anderson

We are on the hunt for the perfect fit
We will keep you posted


God Bless!

Pancreatic cancer?.... Now what?....

In February of 2012, my Father was diagnosed with stage 2 Pancreatic Cancer.

Since that time, we have been fighting it with Chemo, radiation and Many, Many prayers.
As we go into the 2nd leg of this journey, we are faced with the prospect of whipple surgery.
The question becomes....

What should we do now?...
Are there any other options?
Any other choices?

our daily decisions to follow....